"Paper or plastic?" the smart guy asks me…

Posted by — January 26, 2008 3:06 am

The clear solution to the question is PLASTIC. Just like a diamond, plastic is forever. Literally. We don’t degrade in land fills (and paper bags don’t either), and we photodegrade easily in the ocean, breaking into tiny toxic bits that act as sponges for soaking up toxic waste. The tiny toxic bits are eaten like plankton and work up the food chain all the way to the grocery store to exact revenge on humans for attempting to ban us. Humans are weak beings that biodegrade. We Bag Monsters have an evolutionary advantage and I just think you humans will have to leave. Yep. I’m lobbying for a “People Ban” because it is YOU who are bad for the environment! More on that soon… hmmmmmmm… *plotting* …excellent…

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